Friday, 27 September 2013

Oh, oh the Yarndale envy

Oh dear I am so envious, I long to be in Skipton this weekend.  Deep deep deepest sigh.

I made bunting and sent it and may, just may have spotted the tiniest corner glimpse of it in Lucy's latest blog post.  Or is that wishful thinking.

Ooh ooh Strictly is about to start...................................

Thursday, 26 September 2013

The F*ckwit outdoes himself

My girl, 16 and a bit, now in college (crumbs!) went to the Eurogamer Expo up in Edgeware Road.  An organised trip that would mean her being dropped off at a motorway service station in the evening, y'know in the dark and on her own.  Her dad was supposed to collect her from there -  this was arranged two or three days ago.

A proper dad would have told his pub friends that he wouldn't be able to join them this week at their regular meal out (gah!) and would have sat in the car   park waiting for the coach to arrive.

Not this dad, no freakin way was he A) going to miss going out with pub people even though their arrangement came up  After the trip was organised and B) wouldn't have even waited for her but wanted her to tell him when she was nearby so that he could plan to be there 30 seconds before the coach arrived.

So this particular deadbeat dad that she adores and won't hear a word against and probably even now doesn't realise he has let her down.  Again.

After pacing around dressed up in (one of) his going out shirts then phoned my brother to come to our house and collect our car (so that she would recognise it - mmm thoughtful) even though she had no idea where on the road she was.  Kids today (bless 'em) don't look out of car windows any more to see the journey but look at their bleedin' phones.  I realised then what he was going to do and yelled for eldest son to go with my brother so that she wouldn't feel uncomfortable, simply because she cannot stand being out of her comfort zone (little precious).  My youngest brother is like an older brother to her and has been around her all her life and is very at ease, but she is soooo sensitive especially now the counselling has started*.

Eventually when The F*ckwit had left for his date (huh) 15 minutes later she phoned to say she was one mile away from service station my brother turns up here, son jumps into his car and away they whizz, by the time they get there, only about 10 minutes but, even so, the coach has gone and sensibly she is waiting at a well lit Greggs.  She got home safely and excited from the trip, thank God thank God.  And none the wiser about my anxiety and concrete filled stomach.

Please tell me I'm not paranoid, that other Dad's wouldn't behave that way.

The FW has been ill with a head cold this week, only during the day of course, in the evening he is still able to go to pub, then complains about having a bad night.  What a Tit.

*  Counselling has started after a verry long wait.  She is happy, and me? I am watching the can of worms spilling all over the place when the lovely ladies ask "and how are things at home?"  So much so that I have had a two hour session myself and been told that I need to go back to the GP and have more counselling to deal with my depression and to take the anti-depressants originally offered (and refused) because of the adverse effect it is having on my girl who thinks it's all about her.  Of course I will put her first - again - and forget about what I need.  So many years of putting others first and burying my pain so deep deep inside, my belly hurts.

Thursday, 19 September 2013


*whisper*   -   I might just write something, here are some pics to keep you busy.

yum, take two? yes indeedy.

Eastwell Manor, Kent - lush
this is from my only lovely day this summer, indeed this year.  The uber hot day at Broadstairs (with added sulking from the ones left at home even if they did not want to come but did not want me to go either) does not count.